Merry Christmas!

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday! We had a really nice time :o) It was so cute watching Little man open his presents because he's finally old enough to actually know what to do and enjoy the gifts once they are opened. My parents left today and ended up getting delayed so they are going to be arriving home 2 hours late. I miss them but it was a lot of people to have under one roof. It wouldn't have been bad but R and I were still working all last week so it was stressful having to work all day and then come home a lot of people who cannot for the life of them decide what to have for dinner.

I hope some of you can relate to what I'm about to say, let me know what you think. It's really strange to see where you get some of your personality traits from when you are older. I am so indecisive I'm now seeing that my mother is the exact same way. I keep noticing more and more things that my mother does that I do. It's sorta depressing because most of them aren't the best qualities to have. I also see a lot of my qualities that are different from my mom and it's sorta annoying when she doesn't seem to get why I feel, think, or like what I do. Don't get me wrong I love my mom to death but it just seems that we aren't as alike as we used to seem like we were. I didn't really do a great job of explaining my feelings here, hope I didn't totally lose you!

So I feel really inadequate right now after getting all the Christmas gifts from my husband. I hardly had any money and I didn't want to rack up more debt on my credit cards so I tried to keep his presents around $300. I got him a pair of Banana Republic jeans, a really nice shirt and tie that match perfectly, a cute gift basket with some of his favorite foods, wines, candies, etc... and I renewed his subscription to Men's Health magazine. I'm definitely not the best gift giver in the world, but I think he liked what I got him. The problem is that he got me a ridiculous amount of gifts......here's the run down: a wool off white pea coat from J Crew, 4 sweaters from J Crew (one is cashmere), a Coach purse, a skirt from J Crew, an IPod Nano, Friends Season 8 and 9 on DVD, a ton of panties, bra, and 2 pieces of lingerie from Victoria's Secret, Bath and Body Works lotions, bubble bath, and shower gel, I'm sure there are things that I'm forgetting but I think you've got the drift. I love all the gifts but I'm feeling like shit right now and all I want to do is return everything to pay the credit cards. You are probably wondering if I've talked to him about this and the answer is yes. When I noticed all the bags and bags of gifts I tried explaining to him that I didn't want a lot for Christmas and that I don't like the feeling when he spends a ton and I don't have the means to spend very much. We went through every possible conversation and he just doesn't care. It kinda ticks me off too because there have been things I've been asking for for like months that he didn't get. I want a desk so bad so I can have scrapbooking space and I mention it just about everyday and I didn't get that under the tree. I just am beginning to not like Christmas because I hate having this feeling when it's all over. I got a bunch of presents that I really want to just post on Ebay, not because I don't like them but I think it's crazy to rack up debt buying and buying gifts for people. I think it makes him feel good to spend money. After it was all said and done I feel like an ass because I got him like 4 things. I feel guilty and actually told him that I was getting him something else. I don't want to feel this way.

I'm looking forward to the next 2 weeks off! I will have Little man home with me because we are saving some money and not sending him to daycare. I know I'm going to wish that I had some time to myself, but I also want to spend time with him. He is so damn cute and he melts my heart several times per day. He's talking so much and saying so many sentences. Here are a few of my favorites: "WOW, what is that?" "Oh no, I made a mess" and "Baby, shhh" (because the baby we happen to see is sleeping, he puts his finger up to his mouth when he says shhh). They grow up so fast. I was looking back at his baby calendar and scrapbook and it seems like yesterday when he was born. He's becoming quite the Little man :o) Hopefully we have a great two weeks together. He's entering Terrible Two's and throwing a lot of temper tantrums :o)