Week #2

Tomorrow I start training at my school and I'm hoping that I don't have to sit through a million presentations but I'm pretty sure it's going to be a grueling couple weeks. This weekend sucked! I ended up getting sick. I thought I was doing great because all week I was well when everyone else was sick in my house. I bragged about my super immune system and even knocked on some wood but it didn't help, I got it. I'm pretty sure that I'll be better by tomorrow so I didn't get it as bad as R or Baby M, but it still made my weekend suck. The weather also sucked this weekend, it was in the 60's so I guess being in bed most of today wasn't too bad.

I'm definitely letting this new job affect me negatively. I get stressed out and I take it out on other people. I get controlling and try to manage everything because I have no control over my new job and my situation. I'm in the dark about my position and it's freaking me out. I just want to know what's going to be expected of me and familiar with my curriculum, duties, schedule, etc... R did a million wonderful things for me and I was just being a psycho bitch all day. I really wish that I would have just kept my mouth shut and stayed in bed. Or actually thought about my actions and words. He's so pissed at me and I'm so mad at myself. I'm going to spend the whole rest of the week trying to get him to forgive me :( Things are just so chaotic right now.

I just need to calm down, and live life without getting worked up. There is nothing that I can do and worrying and getting all uptight and stressed isn't going to make this new job start out any better. I need to be calm and just roll with it. Starting a new job is scary!