The Latest

I've been meaning to blog for several days but times are definitely busy! I had my baby shower this past weekend and that was very nice. We got catered food from a local Italian restaurant. My mom ordered a cake from a bakery and came down on Friday night to spend the whole weekend. The shower was a noon on Saturday and that was a bit stressful because there was a lot to do to get ready for the shower. There were only about 10 people because quite a few couldn't make it but it ended up being the perfect amount. I got some cute clothes but was pretty disappointed that people didn't shop from the registry because there were some things that we needed really bad and since R isn't working we have no money to purchase the items on our own. I ended up taking several things back to Babi.es R U.S the day after the shower so I could get the things that I really needed.

Baby M was sleeping really well but recently has been up pretty much most of the night. It's been trial and error to see what his deal is and how to remedy him being nocturnal. Last night actually went pretty well, though I won't be splitting shifts with R. He thought it would be a good idea if we took shifts. I would stay up with him until around 1am and then R would get up and stay up for a period, repeat. R went to bed around 10:30-11pm and I stayed up with Baby M. I ended up getting him to go to sleep and actually got some rest from about 11pm until 2am. Usually the night time is when Baby M is fussy and cries a lot so I was prepared for a long couple hours, but pleasantly surprised that he slept and slept well for that matter. I know I'm probably a bad parent for doing this but he sleeps really well on his bopp.y so we prop him very carefully and safely on the couch and I was sleeping on the couch right next to him. When he woke up at around 2am I fed him and then changed his diaper and figured it was a good time to wake up R and retreat to bed for a couple more hours of sleep. Well R did not have any luck and Baby M was crying and very fussy and so I got up at 3am and tried to help but that just made R mad because he wanted me to sleep and I think was insulted that I got up to "try to help" but I couldn't sleep with him crying. Finally I got up at 4am because R was just not being effective and was frustrated and it just wasn't a good situation. I'm much better able to deal with being up at night and better able to get him to calm down and actually get some sleep. Plus it's too hard to communicate with another person at that hour of the morning so there is consistency and both people are on the same page. I ended up getting him to go to sleep pretty much immediately at 4am and we both slept until 6am when my alarm went off.

The nights are definitely hard but I'm just going to take responsibility. If R was working I would be doing it anyway so I mine as well get used to it and give Baby M some consistency at night rather than being passed back and forth and one person not knowing what the other is doing. I think I can grab some naps through out the day so hopefully this works out better. I'm done putting up with R's frustration in the middle of the night. I'm not blaming him because it's damn frustrating when a baby won't stop crying and you feel as though you've done everything you can think of and usually R keeps his cool but I think it's wearing on him and things aren't running smooth.

Still no news about any jobs :( R never heard back from that phone interview so he didn't make it to the next step with that job. He's applied for several but apparently he's been passed up or things are just running really slowly. I jump every time the phone rings praying that the caller ID will light up with the name of a potential job. He did get news that there is a possibility for him to do some contract work for a friend who works at a university down in FL. He's calling about that today. I can't believe that it's already the end of September. I'm starting to look into getting government assistance and researching what programs are out there for the kids and health insurance. It makes me sick to my stomach to know that we both have freaking master's degrees and I'm typing welfare and W.I.C into my goo.gle search engine. Times like this really makes me wonder if we should have ever left F.L. in the first place. Though it was expensive we both had really good paying jobs and insurance.

Yesterday all of us went to the dentist. We've been trying to get all dr appts out of the way before insurance runs out in a week. (so scary to think about!) Luckily, we all had great visits and no cavities. R and I got a full set of X-rays and a cleaning, everything looks great. Little Man had his first visit and he did SO GREAT!!!!! It was really fun for him and the hygienist was really wonderful. It helped that she had three kids of her own all under 5. I got some really cute pictures. My mom stayed and went with us so she could watch Baby M while we were getting our teeth cleaned because R and I had to go at the same time. Next week I have my check up at the OB/GY.N and Baby M has his one month check up. We successfully made it through the colds that Little man and Baby M had so hopefully we stay healthy until we get insurance again.

I'm going to try to blog more because it's a sort of therapy for me when I get stressed. I'm staying positive though and really hoping that we are okay during this tough time. I've been tutoring a lot so I'm able to make money to cover my bills and contribute to the family. I'll keep everyone updated about how things are going!